I have let my blog fall away from my list of priorities. I have let my constant strive for perfection inhibit my opportunity to share my thoughts, experiences, feelings and/or whatever I may have wanted to post because I'm so afraid of not having the right words to express myself and not always knowing what to say. I am scared of judgement if the words aren't just right and afraid that my blog will not "do anything for anyone" or inspire or influence anyone in any way.
Why am I so afraid? What could really in all seriousness go wrong? What should I care if the words I write aren't the most eloquent or exacting? As long as I am sharing, should it really matter? Probably not, but I am prone to perfection. It is both a boon and a burden. It helps me strive for the best and for success... it also limits me, as in if I can't do it 100 % right why do it at all, and results in anxiousness and stress if I am unsure if I am doing the right thing or did the right thing in the right way... whatever "right" is.
I have a hard time letting myself be wrong. I struggle with allowing myself to think that my best effort is good enough if my best effort is not perfect. In the back of my mind, I know its silly, I know I shouldn't worry if I've got everything just right, I know we all make mistakes and what is "perfect" really... This is all just much easier said than done.
This is a start to my effort to just share what is on my mind in a more organic way without worrying so much about the perfection of it. I will try to let myself share me. I will do my best to share in all honesty from my heart and mind, even when difficult to share with the world.
Let's see how this goes...
